The way it should be
by CoOkIeNiNjAa
Summary: And Jason understood the whole thing with Dick wanting to distance himself from Bruce...actually from everyone. Jason understood that better than anyone else.


The streets of Blüdhaven were almost quiet. Here and there you could meet someone homeless guy or a drunkard coming out of a dark corner...But nothing more. Only deserted streets under the black night sky.

Jason hated this town.

The bike he rode was racing through the quiet streets and the growl of the engine echoed through the night.  
He was close and he knew it  
He approached a small apartment complex in the eastern part of the city. Blocks and houses stacked side by side. All equally gray and boring. The whole city was gray and boring. It had nothing to do with the beauty of Gotham.  
Jason still could not understand why a man like Dick had come to live here. Man full of so much energy and life. This shit hole called city was not a place for someone like him. But when Jason (or someone else in the family) tried to raise the issue, Dick just smiled and pretended he did not hear anything.  
And Jason understood the whole thing with Dick wanting to distance himself from Bruce...actually from everyone. Jason understood that better than anyone else.  
The rest of the family was not satisfied with his decision to move to Blüdhaven. Then Jason, for the first time in many years, saw Dick losing his temper. Because at first glance, Richard Grayson looked radiant, generous man, full of kindness and love. But angry Dick and you will face the devil himself. That was another thing that Jason knew quite clear. Because he was the only person able to piss off the bird to such critical level. And he was proud of himself.  
Now, however, things were different. Somehow the bats got used to the absence both of them. True, they called Dick almost every week and Alfred often sends him cookies but Jason was far from offended. He was extremely happy with the lack of "family interest" in him.  
But it was offensive the lack of someone else's interest. And this someone happened to be Dick.

Jason stopped in front of one of the blocks and left his bike in the shadows of the street. He used the fire escape to get to the roof, which Dick called his balcony. And there he saw a well-known sight-the wood lounge and a small table, and on the one edge of the roof were sitting a few pots.  
As always the window at the end of the roof is waiting for him wide open. Jason went through it landing softly in Dick's bedroom, not surprised to find the bed empty. He quietly made his way to the living room, kicking the uniform of his brother. So the bird just got home from work, or otherwise Dickie would have met him before Jason could even get close to this neighborhood.

There was barely perceptible movement in the other side of the room and Jason turned his head. His eyes fell on the figure huddled on the couch. Dick's body was placed in an impossible way, due to the small remaining space on his couch. Jason smiled and leaned over him, waving a few black strands from his face. Dick looked so peaceful, as if nothing could spoil his dream. His chest rose and fell evenly, and occasionally his eyelids fluttered slightly, his body was hidden in the shadows, and across his face roved the city lights. Jason kissed his forehead and turned away, ready to leave. He failed to make one step, when the hand of Dick reached out and caught his wrist. The body beside him shifted and after a moment two crystal blue eyes met his.  
"Sorry, did not mean to wake you." Jason whispered. Dick's lips parted in a lazy smile.  
"I thought you were not coming. Fell asleep waiting for you." He curled up on the couch, giving place Jason to sit beside him.  
He sits down, pulling Dick close to him. "Get some sleep." Jason says his nose buried in his hair. "I'll wake you when it's time for your patrol."  
Dick nodded kissing him. Rough in the beginning but it slowly became softer, passionate. Jason held him tightly against him and eventually they parted panting and left without air. Dick smiled and put his head on Jason's chest. Soon he falls asleep, and Jason stays awake, enjoying the calmness that surrounds them both. He enjoys those kinds of evenings. Evenings when they can just relax and forget about everything going on in their lives for at least few hours. Because usually when they see each other, Dick ends underneath him moaning, screaming his name and leaving claw marks on his shoulders and back.  
But over time they started to get used to his company, with every touch, every kiss ... Jason increasingly be caught off guard, sloppy. And he still was not ready to admit it even to himself, but that feeling that had taken hold in his heart began to grow. Because his death took anything but that stupid crush he had on Dick. Because it always had to be Dick ... And it would always be Dick.  
But this so-called "love" was impossible even if it wasn't true. It would be too dangerous, irresponsible, stupid to leave feelings lead them. They would never be happy, never be able to love each other... never be able to have a normal life. This was the burden of all of them, everyone hiding under cloaks and masks. Work came first; the life of other people came first...then it follows your own desires, goals and dreams. Then follows your own self. These were their laws, their rules.  
He looked at Dick and smiled sadly. And just because of Dick and because of this small but amazing thing they shared, Jason would have to continue to deny and lie to himself. Because it was the right thing to do...the way it should be.


End file.
